TWILIGHT: ECLIPSE
23 year old men die when they watch it alone
Submitted by: JessEsky via deMotivational Builder
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TWILIGHT: ECLIPSE
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FIRST
LET THE TROLLING BEGIN
I spare my pet trolls the time wasted on you.
well congratulations you’ve single handed secured world peace! MY ASS! you fail at living!
You fail at spelling “single-handedly”.
I’d say watching Twilight alone, while being a man… is pretty suspicious.
It might be in the top ten places men shouldn’t die.
Agreed
I know it’s not funny, but…damn it, that’s hilarious. XD
“Police haven’t said whether they are treating the death as suspicious” ???
What’s so weird about that now?
They could’ve just had a heart attack while watching, and nobody noticed.
Because a 23 year old dying of a heart attack is never suspicious… Yeah…
A 23 year odl randomly dropping dead is generally considered suspicious until they actually are certain it was natural causes.
The police still haven’t released an official cause of death, but have only said it is not suspicious, and the matter is closed.
The guy was homeless, so probably drugs or poor health.
The most perplexing question is, if he was homeless, why would he spend what little money he had on Twilight?
of course its not supicious, it was suicide, he went in knowing that it would kill him, and it did, end of story
ya he commited suicide cause twilight sucks XD
not suspicious to have a heart attack at 23 if you weigh 400 lbs
Why ever did that damn guy watch it anyway…
Some people are just to tiered of living and can’t take it any more.
But seriously suicide is never funny people even if it’s by Twilight
…it’s a little funny….
Probably got three minutes in and killed himself. I’m not sure I’d even last that long.
Let this be a warning to those guys who said they wouldn’t be caught dead watching twilight…
XD. I wouldn’t be caught dead watching Twilight. I wouldn’t be caught ALIVE watching Twilight. But I WOULD read New Moan.
That poor Kiwi. At least he’s free from the horrors of Twilight
Thats a win on his part
i guess all that faping is starting to pay off
Keep up the good work!
10$ he went there to scream at the fantards about how much it sucks, and was killed by the prepubescent fangirls.
i am depositing $10 in your account now…
I love that the spokeswoman’s name was Victoria. Maybe she’s the vampire that killed him or had one of her minions do it.
And before anyone jumps down my throat, yes, I’ve read all the Twilight books. Yes, I know they’re terrible. No, I haven’t seen Eclipse.
I like how the chick that found him’s name is Victoria. (Thats the bad guy in the movie, for all the people who haven’t seen it, but say it sucks.)
It’s ironic that the spokeswoman’s name is Victoria. Maybe she’s the vampire that killed him, or maybe she had one of her minions do it.
And before anybody jumps down my throat, yes, I’ve read all the Twilight books. Yes, I know they’re terrible. No, I haven’t seen Eclipse.
Well of course it is okay to read to books before you hate. That’s how it’s done right? It’s not like people hate without figuring out WHY they hate besides horrible actors… right?
This is a freaking brilliant escape plan. I’ll try it next time I’m over at a family reunion.
Peter don’t! They say if you watch that video, you die.
A cookie for you, good sir or madam.
We need to find out what religion this guy was.
See he was sitting there, looking at the movie and then he went “Oh God, kill me now” and his God actually answered his prayers!
You sir, have just won the internet
I dont really care about this…i wanna see the article that says “Mom gets charged after dog bites off kid’s testicles” LMAO! look under the Eclipse foto, it says it as the last one
Heres the link for the dog article.
http://news.msn.co.nz/article/1079752/mum-charged-after-dog-bites-off-sons-testicles
I was going to post a link for you, but I don’t seem to be able to.
The website is www msn co nz.
A quick search for words like “mum charged dog bites testicles” should find it.
I wonder if he choked to death on popcorn while laughing, or if he wore a “And then Buffy staked Edward. The End,” t-shirt and got lynched.
Eclipse, where “The Ring” failed….
If you’re watching sparkly vampires, and you’re alone, you’re not a man.
I would watch sparkly vampires with a girl if I thought I might — check that, if I were certain I would — get a world class hummer afterwards. I can’t think of any other reason to.
world class hummer?
Hummer? horrible word, but that IS how I got my boyfriend to go with me.
Wow. Most of us only die on the inside after exposure to Twilight.
I was wondering if this was actually real, or faked. But sure enough: http://news.msn.co.nz/article/6912625/mans-body-found-in-wellington-cinema-after-twilight-screening (In case anyone else is curious, and maybe save ya a google search. :p)
I think it’s funny, in an insensitive sort of way, at the end of the article they write “Eager to see Edward, Bella and Jacob reunite in the third installation of the Twilight saga? Then watch the Eclipse trailer below!” followed by an embedded video. :p
I feel really bad, because someone died in this situation, but…
I laughed until my eyes tear’d up.
Wellington’s my city. Woot. My sister saw Eclipse in the screening right after the one the guy was in. Didn’t see anything strange when she got out though, no cops or anything. Everyone will love Wellington now for killing the Twilight fans one by one, right? …..right?
I was in the same cinema this night, too.
And you’re so right.
He bled to death when his testicles tried to left the theater without him.
Damn thee verb tense, damn thee!
You’re wrong, his testicles did not try to leave. You have to hand in your testicles, man card, and self-esteem if you buy a ticket to see Twilight.
A truely epic win by slugsvomit, also your name is a good discription of twilight
This is the first time I didn’t laugh at anything Twilight related. It’s just sad, it pains me. And I wonder how no one leaving the cinema saw him like that.
I think he died waiting for the good part to start.
I’ve been waiting for someone to make something out of this ever since I heard it.
And yes, it’s real. http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/3885798/Man-found-dead-after-Twilight-screening-in-Wellington
This is a classical case of the body shutting down from internal hemmoraging trying to protect itself. When they pop his skull open they’ll just see black goo because the brain fried itself.
the sparkles in the movie killed him…
thats my city
Maybe, just maybe, he thought he would score a 35 year old mother, without realizing that the twilight series would bore him to death, literally!