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Those poor kids who aren’t actually under the desks are toast. D:
“mmmm….warm buttery toast…”
I love quoting Family Guy lines
Notice how the smart kids are the ones who are sitting at the head of the classroom… as you get further and further towards the back, the harder it is to figure out how to cover yourself with a desk.
They just wanted to be in the picture. Poor kids
Been there, done that. Totally terrified as a kid. An entire generation — mine — with anxiety problems from knowing we were gonna die.
omg you basterds .. how can you make fun of that?
It’s the internet. A DURR.
Because XD We actually thought that would save us from a NUCLEAR BOMB
Laugh it up and pull the stick out ya butt. History is always funny in hindsight
Hiding under a table wouldn’t really protect against a bomb, but i could save you during the aftermath. The schockwave could break down a building and a table could save you from getting severely injured. Against a nuclear bomb it won’t work though, but it works just fine with earthquakes or non-nuclear bombs.
But mostly, it helps against panicing and running.
If you’re far enough from the hypocenter, it’s not bad advice. You’re at least marginally protected from flying debris caused by the blast. If you’re upwind at the time and far enough away, fallout isn’t too big a deal.
Assuming a single bomb, of course. For a “The Day After” all-out attack, you’re pretty screwed no matter what.
Yeah like standing in a door way or an open area would help in an earthquake and the shockwave from a regular bomb could be avoided.
Well done
You make an excellent point
Well if you were far enough away, then it would help.
The kid in front wants to know what the f*** you’re looking at. Now.
I remember doing those drills in 2nd grade,but the next year (1978?) they had stopped.
They did that for me in middle school till 2003…
They’re still doing it.
But for earthquakes, I’m sure, not bombs.
We were still doing it in Spokane, WA in the late 80′s.
I was 12 the last time I remember doing that. And I was born in ’76. I think they continued doing it in primary schools (K-6 in WA) all the way up to 1989 when the cold war officially ended.
This is the video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKqXu-5jw60 watch it and you too will understand why this is funny. THESE methods are how to survive a nuke
The kids in back, both boys, were probably too tall to fit under their desks. I remember having to do this as a kid. They knew all along that it wouldn’t save anyone, but it possibly eliminated lots of nightmares for children thinking they could be “saved” by crawling under something.
With today’s nukes, there are few things in the world that can let you survive a nuke. But even in the 70′s this was just a dumb idea. might keep the debris from dropping on your head, but the fallout is pretty much un-escape-able.
You act as though Nukes today are far different from the ones available in the ’70′s.
The biggest in both cases are still 100+ Megatons in yield. Capable of making a crater roughly the size of the British Isles under optimum conditions.
Honestly, some of our biggest nukes have been dismantled now. We are mainly keeping the smaller, more accurate, faster, longer range ones.
I remember doing those drills and thinking “this is stupid” even back then but you HAD to do it. Like the cheap school desk would protect you from tons of concrete if the ceiling collapsed. RIGHT!
No, but it might save you from flying shards of glass, which is a lot more likely to happen.
The shards of glass would be moving horizontally not vertically so not really at least not for the ones on the outside rows. The was intended to keep the masses calm and give them hope in case their leaders were idiots and the button got pushed. Thankfully no one got too stupid.
I was the class ‘fat kid’, and wouldn’t fit under the desk. I had to stand in the closet. It’s no wonder I’ve needed a lifetime of therapy and psych meds…
Everybody knows all you need is a good, sturdy, lead-lined refrigerator to survive an A-bomb!
And to have drunk from the Holy Grail in the last movie.
I still hold that it was a slight bit of Holy Grail magic in him that saved Indy, not the fridge.
Thats actually the best theory I’ve heard so far. Way better than the usual “OMG WTF how unrealisitc!!!” comments. Like Indiana Jones was ever realisitc…
Heh, my mom had to watch those ‘duck and cover’ videos when she was a kid, and she said that all the kids knew that hiding under a desk wasn’t going to do anything to help you. The whole point was that it was supposed to give the kids something to do (before they die) or just have them panic (and then die.)
I find it amazing that so many people just don’t understand this concept. Of course covering up won’t save you if you’re hit directly, but it certainly raises your chances if a bomb hits nearby. The larger a bomb is, the larger the area where you’re likely to be killed by shrapnel (eg. broken glass) or other indirect effects of the explosion.
We had these drills in the 60s, and the teacher’s book said Civil Defense, but I never understood why.
They were called Tornado Drills. Duck and cover is pretty stupid for nukes, but damn sensible in a tornado.
America: Proudly lying to it’s own citizens since 1776.
Not really.
Being under a desk won’t protect you from a direct hit of a bomb if you’re in the immediate blast zone, but it will protect from fallen debris from the shockwave if you’re far enough away. A lot of people survived from Hiroshima and Nagasaki, a lot of them even without serious affects from radiation. I wonder how many more would have survived if they had prior warning and had the chance to get under furniture or underground.
Making it a “AMERICA DOES THIS AMERICA DOES THAT” issue shows your stupidity, considering other countries did the same thing. It was better than nothing.
The reality of nuclear war is that everyone is doomed if that happens. There’s little point in trying to warn anyone. If the fireball and the blast wave doesn’t kill you, the radiation and the nuclear winter will. You can hide under your desk all you want, it’s not going to save you.
The US government telling school children to hide under their desks if they see the flash and “Duck And Cover” was pure propaganda. They knew dam well that nobody was surviving a nuclear war, but they continued to tell the US public otherwise.
Their excuse was that they were trying to avoid mass panic. 20 years ago 30% of schoolchildren in the US believed they would die in a nuclear war.
And just to elaborate on your point, there were enough nukes in the combined arsenals of the US and USSR to carpet the planet several times over. The lucky ones would be the ones fully exposed or at ground zero (to the bomb blast, not the Ground Zero in NYC). They would die instantly; everyone else would die a lingering radiation death.
The US government had an explicit policy of keeping the public confused about the effects of radiation. Hollywood cooperated, with movies about giant ants and spiders and people getting strange powers. But if you get exposed to radiation in sufficient quantity, it has only one outcome: you die. And that was even more true in the 1950s than it is today; they didn’t really have any good way of treating radiation sickness.
” 20 years ago 30% of schoolchildren in the US believed they would die in a nuclear war.”
In the ’90s? After the USSR was defeated? I think you need to go back a little further, when the NYT and NBC were appalled by that dreadful cowboy in the White House, the one who dared to speak of actually defeating the Evil Empire. Those are the days I remember when media pollsters, shysters, and shils were busy churning up their hate machine and trying to make it look like all teh pore chillunz dident tink deyed ebber groe up, ‘cuz ob dat crazy guy in teh Wite Howse.
What? “Hollywood co-operated”? Now I know you’re on something.
Oops, I meant in the 80s. I forget how much time has passed since I was young.
And no, Hollywood was very much in bed with the Feds back then. They were afraid of Senator McCarthy, among others.
Try the late 50′s and early 60′s. That is the time period you are talking about (helps if you were alive then) and yes the government did a lot of things that were pretty shady like sterilizing retarded or “mentally defective” children. So when people tell you it was a better time just nod your head and walk away.
The late 50s and early 60s were when Hollywood was deliberately fooling people about the effects of radiation.
The 80s were when the kids were polled about thinking they’ll die in a nuclear war. By then no one believed in “duck and cover” any more, and they knew that no one would survive a nuclear war if one occurred. They all thought it would be the way they died.
The reality of this is that your entire position is heavily tainted by your desire to bash the US and ignore context. You don’t really know what you’re talking about.
This was during the 50′s when there were not enough nuclear weapons on both sides to actually end the planet in a global nuclear winter. There were no long-range ICBMs yet. Well into the 60′s the Soviets didn’t even have the ability to strike the mainland US with nuclear missiles, only bombers… many of which would have been shot down in the event of a nuclear war.
The “duck and cover” is not as stupid as you want to believe it was. First off, again you ignore that other countries taught the exact same thing. You’re choosing to focus on the US and only the US probably just because of your predetermined bias. Secondly you ignore the fact that taking cover would undoubtedly save lives compared to teaching people to do nothing and just panic. Hiroshima and Nagasaki showed that people who were protected from DEBRIS later survived the blasts. Thousands and thousands of people survived, many of which were only a few miles from ground zero. Unless you think the Soviets could blanket every single population center in the US with a fireball in the 50′s, your argument pretty much has no truth or logic to it.
The soviets did not really have enough accurate nuclear delivery systems to ensure destruction of the entire US until the 80s when their submarine and ICBM forces were at their peek. The reason the Soviets moved nuclear missiles into Cuba in the 60′s was to fill a huge gap in their nuclear capabilities.
If the US and the Soviets Union were to go to war with each other in the 50′s, there would have been many survivors. In fact, most Americans would have survived. A lot less would have survived if people just ran around screaming in an attack instead of taking cover.
Pretty, much… be quiet. You know nothing.
First the bombs dropped on Japan were tiny compared with the bombs of even 5 years later and in this case quality beats quantity every time. Second the fallout from the release of even half of the arsenal would circle the world and fall for years wherever the wind blew it basically poisoning the whole world for generations. Not to mention the firestorm every city hit by a bomb would become. And while most schools were concrete and up to code they were not made to withstand the seismic impact of a near miss and would pancake down flattening everything. The science shows that ANY nuclear war would effectively reduce the world to being uninhabitable for humans for generations due to fallout and poisoning of the ground and water supplies. Disinformation is nothing new. I am and love being an American but I am not blind we have our faults but I believe this is the best place to live in the world. But never turn a blind eye to the powers-that-be that leads to horrors like the Nazis.
The reality of this is that your entire position is heavily tainted by your desire to bash the US and ignore context. You don’t really know what you’re talking about.
This was during the 50′s when there were not enough nuclear weapons on both sides to actually end the planet in a global nuclear winter. There were no long-range ICBMs yet. Well into the 60′s the Soviets didn’t even have the ability to strike the mainland US with nuclear missiles, only bombers… many of which would have been shot down in the event of a nuclear war.
The reality of this is that your entire position is heavily tainted by your desire to bash the US and ignore context. You don’t really know what you’re talking about.
This was during the 50′s when there were not enough nuclear weapons on both sides to actually end the planet in a global nuclear winter. There were no long-range ICBMs yet. Well into the 60′s the Soviets didn’t even have the ability to strike the mainland US with nuclear missiles, only bombers… many of which would have been shot down in the event of a nuclear war.
The “duck and cover” is not as stupid as you want to believe it was. First off, again you ignore that other countries taught the exact same thing. You’re choosing to focus on the US and only the US probably just because of your predetermined bias. Secondly you ignore the fact that taking cover would undoubtedly save lives compared to teaching people to do nothing and just panic. Hiroshima and Nagasaki showed that people who were protected from DEBRIS later survived the blasts. Thousands and thousands of people survived, many of which were only a few miles from ground zero. Unless you think the Soviets could blanket every single population center in the US with a fireball in the 50′s, your argument pretty much has no truth or logic to it.
The soviets did not really have enough accurate nuclear delivery systems to ensure destruction of the entire US until the 80s when their submarine and ICBM forces were at their peek. The reason the Soviets moved nuclear missiles into Cuba in the 60′s was to fill a huge gap in their nuclear capabilities.
If the US and the Soviets Union were to go to war with each other in the 50′s, there would have been many survivors. In fact, most Americans would have survived. A lot less would have survived if people just ran around screaming in an attack instead of taking cover.
Pretty, much… be quiet. You know nothing.
I feel kind of terrible for laughing at this.
And no one notices that nuclear warfare and the holocaust have nothing in common? Nuclear weapons where only used on 2 japanese cities, not as part of the holocaust… Title fail.
No one has ownership of the word “holocaust”. If you look up the definition of holocaust, you will see that it does work in the title. Here, let me do it for you:
hol·o·caust [hol-uh-kawst, hoh-luh-] Show IPA
–noun
1.
a great or complete devastation or destruction, esp. by fire.
2.
a sacrifice completely consumed by fire; burnt offering.
3.
( usually initial capital letter ) the systematic mass slaughter of European Jews in Nazi concentration camps during World War II (usually prec. by the ).
4.
any mass slaughter or reckless destruction of life.
NO ONE owns the rights or definition of/to the word “HOLOCAUST”. Need a definition? Here:
hol·o·caust [hol-uh-kawst, hoh-luh-] Show IPA
–noun
1.
a great or complete devastation or destruction, esp. by fire.
2.
a sacrifice completely consumed by fire; burnt offering.
3.
( usually initial capital letter ) the systematic mass slaughter of Europeans in concentration camps during World War II (usually prec. by the ).
4.
any mass slaughter or reckless destruction of life.
DAAAAAAAAAM You just owned him
The first reply didnt show up for hours later. I am suspecting it will happen to this one too since this is the second time I have posted this too.
So weird, it didnt post the first time so I had to post it again. And now several hours later, BOTH posts show up. Must be a comment holocaust!!
katpharm is correct. There’s a difference between a holocaust and The Holocaust. In fact, large animal sacrifices in ancient Greece were sometimes called holocausts.
The basic sense of the Greek is “everything burned.” That’s both why an all-out nuclear war, and Hitler’s intended total destruction of the Jewish people are called by that name. The Jewish one is distinguished by the definite article and capitalization.
In fact, in the Hebrew part of the Holy Scriptures, certain sacrifices to God in the Temple were burnt — thus the common phrase of ‘burnt offerings.’ Depending on the translation, these were also called ‘holocaust offerings.’ The Jews’ naming the above referenced experience ‘The Holocaust’ was a deliberate effort to link the ideas, and portray the event as a literal sacrifice to the Lord.
I guess he’s right. Since WWII, I don’t think the term has been used for anything else than reference to The Holocaust. At least I’ve never heard it being used. Doesn’t make me right, tho..
Lewis Black nuclear holocaust skit. This is why its funny.
Duck and cover
When I was in grade school, they had an alternative method: stand in the hall, leaning with your face against the wall, and clasp your hands behind your head!
I learned an even better one in middle school. “Put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye.”
Back in the ’80s the government tried saying that a kitchen door covered with dirt would protect you from fall out, and that the post office would be equipped with enough forwarding address cards for everyone!
This makes me think of the scene in “Iron Giant” when the kids were watching a cartoon about Atomic Holocaust “defense” in school XD
Yeah yeah yeah we know. Har har har. Considering that the yield of most bombs in the 50s were a significant fraction of newer ones, and considering that if the balloon ever did go up, the overwhelming number of places on the map were not going to be Ground Zeros, this was probably about the most effective thing that could be done. Maybe not terribly effective, but better than going out to stare at the fireball on the horizon, and much better than pounding broken glass up your fundament, which is what most of you snarking knuckledraggers should do.
No, of course your desk will not save your life from an epicentric airburst at 5000 feet. But of course, it wouldn’t save you from a blockbuster, a V-1, 50 square feet of napalm, or Mahmud with a dynamite vest.
You do what you can, and pray for the best.
My desk saved me from a bully in High School.
Guy kept f-ing with me in Freshman science class, and one day I just snapped, jumped up, picked up my desk (on of those desk-chair hybrids) and held it over his head while I yelled, “Cut the S***!”. In retrospective, his face was a combination of fear and surprise…
Got three days off of school for that, but he had his friends never bothered me again.
Wowz! tell meh summore storeeze pleaze
It gets better. That old “Duck and cover” video advised people that were outside, and not near a desk to protect themselves from the muke by covering their heads with newspaper.
I never knew that newspaper could protect one from a nuclear explosion.
The newspaper was to keep the fallout off your body.
Good luck with the rest of it.
We used to have these drills when I was in school. One of the things they warned us about was to keep our eyes covered so that we wouldn’t look at the blast and be flash-blinded.
And I really get tired of seeing all these anti-American trolls here who keep assuming that Americans are stupid or that it’s somehow our fault for the Cold War or the state of the world today. Europeans don’t have any room to talk, so who are they to judge us?
ha! this whole drill is a fail, so that girl in the back fails at failing!! lol
Actually, ducking under the desk is still taught in case of earthquakes (I’m from California), explosions, and other disasters.
I wonder if mankind will peak one day so that those people at the peak age will not be laughed at by their own future generations
Artyom get under the table!!!